Ages

You finally became an independent person. You have money to spend in whatever you wish. But what is the price you are paying for this?

There was time, a lot of time. So many years to be lived. There was plenty of time to visit friends, to swap stickers, to play barefoot in the dirty street. Riding the bicicle, kicking the ball and breaking the window of the angry neighbour. There was not big worries, responsabilities and self-pressure.

The world was calm and beautiful. The tears were real and the smile too. The friendship was sincere and when the group of friends used to meet, they used to laugh at anything. Everything was funny. However, there was no independence and everything was all up to our mothers: the money to buy candies, going to the movies, the soccer ball, the toys, the permission to stay out of home until late. No independence and no money.

And time started to fly. Monday has just begun and the following day is already Friday. Time flies and does not last. The 24 hours day is summarized in 6, 4 hours or even less. You do not have time to talk to your friends anymore. Your friends also do not have time for you because now they work. You change, your friends change, they date, they be off and when you meet them, you are no longer friends. You are just acquainted people and your conversation stays focused on “hello, how is your family”?

Why do not you try to make some new friends? Oh, now sincere frienships are rare. Beauty and personal and professional success become prerequisites for this. Your friend tricks you and became your supervisor because he stole your ideas. You find out that your best friend cheated you with your husband. Or perhaps another friend of yours just disappears because he is dating and his girlfriend wants him to live just for her.

That is adult life, my friend. Feel ridiculous whenever you wish playing with your friends. Feel ridiculous whenever you miss espontaneous and true friendships. Feel ridiculous whenever you feel like running away to anywhere. That is adult life, hold on!

Wake up early, have lunch, laugh at your boss’ stupid joke, tolerate your coworker who complains about everybody and everything all the time, come back home in the crowed subway, arrive home very tired, cook the dinner, watch some TV, take a shower and sleep because in the following day we are going to have more of the same routine. And when the weekend arrives, you will have to drink alcohol to have fun in places you are just a good behind the storefront.

There is a lifestyle to be followed. Force yourself to be in and pretend you enjoy it. Censor your childhood desires and the unarchived dreams. They will say you are out of your mind. Time is short. Now your mother is your job. Your family are your coworkers that only talk about their families, home activites and sex. Friends are gone and each one of them chose different ways. Your friend is the television. And besides your job is your mean of living, is also your getaway from the reality. Because here we live to work for us and for people who can enjoy life, that is nothing but something that happens while others are having fun.

Out of the water

I am like those fishes that swim against the current. I have my own ideas and my particular way of thinking, behaving and living.

I break the rules and prejudices. No, I am not a rebel. I just can not enjoy what they impose as “funny” or “boring” so, I am a fish out of the water.

When people show their hot bodies at the beach and I show all the whiteness of my less developed muscles, I am a fish out of the water.

When people tell the places they have visited around the world and I only have been 40km away, I am a fish out of the water.

When people have a social life and have somewhere to go and to do every weekend and my few friends are away or busy, I am a fish out of the water.

When people can buy expensive things, spend a huge sum of money in whatever they want and I suffer a lot when I have to buy a simple t-shirt, I am a fish out of the water.

When people talk about having kids and a family and I can not have it or prefer to be single, when people eat with a fork and I eat with a spoon, I am a fish out of the water.

When everybody make fun of other’s tragedies or supposed choices they have made and I do not think it is funny and fair and I have to realize that this is real and we have such a disgusting society, I am a fish out of the water.

And when people can not think on their own, when the ignorance is the tendency of this summer that never ends, when people do not have a thinking brain inside their heads and I can think on my own and have a thinking brain, I am a fish out of the water.

And fishes out of the water feel weird and strange because they are different compared to the other fishes and they know only a handful of fishes that can really understand them. Sometimes, they would like to be like the others and feel they do not have a problem. But unfortunately they ca not fool themselves so they feel they are fishes out of the water.